My Sweet Isabel
Always asking hard questions.
Always searching for the meaning in things.
Always ready to give compliment and to see the beautiful things in life.
Last week Isabel asked me a simple question.
Isabel: Am I pretty?
Me(pausing to think how to correctly answer this question: Yes. And what makes you pretty is the way you treat people with your kindness. It's what's on the inside that makes you pretty!
Isabel: Thanks, Mom.
Big sigh of relief. This question comes from a girl who literally will change her outfit at least three times before she goes to school. Isabel will also ask me to help her do her hair, which I'm more then happy to. But if there are fly-aways, it's a no go and she quickly abandons the piggy tails. Just yesterday I did exactly what she asked me to do, two small braids, tied together in the back. But because there was a slight bump at the crown of her head she removed one of the braids. At least she waited to take it out at school.
Isabel: Thanks, Mom.
Big sigh of relief. This question comes from a girl who literally will change her outfit at least three times before she goes to school. Isabel will also ask me to help her do her hair, which I'm more then happy to. But if there are fly-aways, it's a no go and she quickly abandons the piggy tails. Just yesterday I did exactly what she asked me to do, two small braids, tied together in the back. But because there was a slight bump at the crown of her head she removed one of the braids. At least she waited to take it out at school.
Of course I want my girls to have high self-esteem and self-worth. But I don't want them to be completely focused on their looks. Yes, it's so good to make sure you look nice and well kept. I know that girls lose their self-esteem as they get older and start comparing themselves to other people. I've been there before, it's rough for a girl. I still find myself comparing.
How do you teach girls to value what's on the inside more then what's on the outside? How do you continually teach a girl their divine nature? Do I, myself, feel divine? Sometimes I don't. I think this is the key to helping girls make it through those rough rough junior high and high school years. Knowing that they are a daughter of God, who loves them, is vital to their survival. Finding happiness from within us. No one else can make us happy. Not our freinds, our parents, or spouses. We have to find that for ourselves. And we find that by believing that we are Divine.
How do you teach girls to value what's on the inside more then what's on the outside? How do you continually teach a girl their divine nature? Do I, myself, feel divine? Sometimes I don't. I think this is the key to helping girls make it through those rough rough junior high and high school years. Knowing that they are a daughter of God, who loves them, is vital to their survival. Finding happiness from within us. No one else can make us happy. Not our freinds, our parents, or spouses. We have to find that for ourselves. And we find that by believing that we are Divine.
3 comments:
I also think it helps if they hear and feel compliments from you on a very regular basis.
I remember answering a hard questions you asked me in Jr. High with a positive response and you replied, "You have to say that because you are my mom!" True and my thoughts were the same as yours, you want your children to feel good about themselves and that they are beautifu.
This is such a hard thing. I worry about it with Carly also. I don't want her to focus so much on her looks that she is constantly stressing about them. I want to help her to have a better self esteem than I did growing up.
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